I’m so sorry to hear about Dolly and to read this. It’s beautiful and I feel your love for her and your pain so acutely. I lost my wonderful nutter of a dog Monty two months ago and couldn’t do anything but howl with grief for two weeks. I still talk to him constantly.
We love them to distraction and are loved unconditionally in return. What a wonderful gift and hideous heartbreak at the end.
Had to re read it as I lost my cat last month. Found him dead on the pavement, he was hit by a car. Fucking awful memory and time. Grief is hard, the loss feels sometimes unbearable. But eventually I'll heal right ?
I’m so sorry to hear this. I think grief over cats and dogs can be really acute because they never grow up. They don’t learn to feed themselves or go out and get jobs so you retain huge control over their lives and that can make you feel guilty when they die, especially if you have to decide to have them put down. Your love for her is very well captured in your writing. I hope you enjoy the time left with her x
Oh Anna I’m so sorry. This is so beautifully written. Weirdly it feels very familiar as I lost my dad to cancer last year and grief is grief whether it’s a parent or a pet. Keep writing about it, it will help. I found gardening and exercise also really helped afterwards. X
I'm sorry you have to go through this. We lost the family dog last month, age 14. He was a tiny chihuahua who weighed less than a kilo when he died. He, like Dolly, lost a lot of weight, his spine jutting out. I know what you're going through and I'm sorry for how painful it is. I have had to bid many a goodbyes to family dogs and cats; I've had put them to sleep and watch them pass in the night, I too have slept on sofas and shower floors when my dog couldn't make it to the bathroom. I promise you, you will know when the time is right to say goodbye to Dolly. You are resilient and your grief is real. I hope you are okay.
First of all, I am really sorry for your Dolly's diagnosis. I'm just glad you are still able to enjoy memorable moments with her with the palliative care. Thanks for opening your heart about this issue, it usually brings a little comfort sharing it with others (although I do agree with you when you say that not everyone understands the kind of relationship some owners have with their pets).
Your text resonates with my situation 100%. See, my Pinky, a 15-year-old shih-tzu, was diagnosed with dog dementia a year and a half ago. Before that, despite her already old age, she was still bubbly, alert, playing with her toys, and independent. Today, when it comes to basic needs (drinking water, feeding, finding her bed), my husband and I need to do everything for her. She's a super healthy dog overall but personality-wise, I can barely recognize her (and she can barely recognize us). So, for some time now, I've been grieving the dog she used to be before this stupid illness got to her and have been struggling with the fact that I don't know how long she's going to be around, and if I'm the one who's going to have to make that impossible decision.
But you know what? Although it's hard, I try not to think too much about it. I just cherish all the seconds I have with her (even though she doesn't interact anymore, I want her to feel that I'm there for her - I kiss her, I hug her, I whisper "I love you") and try to remind myself over and over how blessed I am for having had such a loyal companionship throughout all these years; and how lucky she is for having had someone who loved her and took care of her as much as I did.
P.S.: words from someone — aka "me" — who had to put her 18-year-old cat down in December (the most difficult decision of my life).
"It is the most unselfish act in all of life to let one go that we have found beloved - Kate McGahan"
This brought back so many memories of our dog's end of life. Trust me, you will know. It is very obvious that they lose the will to live. We didn't think we would know either, but it is very, very obvious. I'm so sorry you are going through this. It is gutting.
I’m so sorry about Dolly, Anna. I’ve unfortunately been there with two of my own dogs and it’s just really hard. There’s really nothing anyone can say to make it better, but I hope the time you two have together is the best ❤️ She knows how much she’s loved.
Oh god, Anna. This made me weep. Wishing you lots of good days together. Please give her a gentle chin scritch from me xx
Ps our 11 year old dog has a cough that similarly evades explanation. Thanks for the nudge to get it checked again x
I’m so sorry to hear about Dolly and to read this. It’s beautiful and I feel your love for her and your pain so acutely. I lost my wonderful nutter of a dog Monty two months ago and couldn’t do anything but howl with grief for two weeks. I still talk to him constantly.
We love them to distraction and are loved unconditionally in return. What a wonderful gift and hideous heartbreak at the end.
Sending lots of love 🐾💕
Did I cry my eyes out ? I certainly did. Sending you hugs, this was a beautiful post ❤️
❤️❤️❤️
Had to re read it as I lost my cat last month. Found him dead on the pavement, he was hit by a car. Fucking awful memory and time. Grief is hard, the loss feels sometimes unbearable. But eventually I'll heal right ?
I’m so sorry to hear this. I think grief over cats and dogs can be really acute because they never grow up. They don’t learn to feed themselves or go out and get jobs so you retain huge control over their lives and that can make you feel guilty when they die, especially if you have to decide to have them put down. Your love for her is very well captured in your writing. I hope you enjoy the time left with her x
Thanks, Jack. It's so true - that dependency our pets have on us really colours our grief from them ❤️
Oh Anna I’m so sorry. This is so beautifully written. Weirdly it feels very familiar as I lost my dad to cancer last year and grief is grief whether it’s a parent or a pet. Keep writing about it, it will help. I found gardening and exercise also really helped afterwards. X
We're here,silently holding the space you need. Sending you 💓
Your love for Dolly shines out of every photo. Her love for you will help you through the storm x
I'm sorry you have to go through this. We lost the family dog last month, age 14. He was a tiny chihuahua who weighed less than a kilo when he died. He, like Dolly, lost a lot of weight, his spine jutting out. I know what you're going through and I'm sorry for how painful it is. I have had to bid many a goodbyes to family dogs and cats; I've had put them to sleep and watch them pass in the night, I too have slept on sofas and shower floors when my dog couldn't make it to the bathroom. I promise you, you will know when the time is right to say goodbye to Dolly. You are resilient and your grief is real. I hope you are okay.
I'm so very sorry you and Dolly are going through all this. It's so hard. Sending much love.
Sending you and Dolly lots of love, Anna.
This is so beautifully written, thank you for sharing it. Dolly sounds like a wonderful pet and companion. x
Hi, Anna!
First of all, I am really sorry for your Dolly's diagnosis. I'm just glad you are still able to enjoy memorable moments with her with the palliative care. Thanks for opening your heart about this issue, it usually brings a little comfort sharing it with others (although I do agree with you when you say that not everyone understands the kind of relationship some owners have with their pets).
Your text resonates with my situation 100%. See, my Pinky, a 15-year-old shih-tzu, was diagnosed with dog dementia a year and a half ago. Before that, despite her already old age, she was still bubbly, alert, playing with her toys, and independent. Today, when it comes to basic needs (drinking water, feeding, finding her bed), my husband and I need to do everything for her. She's a super healthy dog overall but personality-wise, I can barely recognize her (and she can barely recognize us). So, for some time now, I've been grieving the dog she used to be before this stupid illness got to her and have been struggling with the fact that I don't know how long she's going to be around, and if I'm the one who's going to have to make that impossible decision.
But you know what? Although it's hard, I try not to think too much about it. I just cherish all the seconds I have with her (even though she doesn't interact anymore, I want her to feel that I'm there for her - I kiss her, I hug her, I whisper "I love you") and try to remind myself over and over how blessed I am for having had such a loyal companionship throughout all these years; and how lucky she is for having had someone who loved her and took care of her as much as I did.
P.S.: words from someone — aka "me" — who had to put her 18-year-old cat down in December (the most difficult decision of my life).
"It is the most unselfish act in all of life to let one go that we have found beloved - Kate McGahan"
Lots of love 💟💟
This brought back so many memories of our dog's end of life. Trust me, you will know. It is very obvious that they lose the will to live. We didn't think we would know either, but it is very, very obvious. I'm so sorry you are going through this. It is gutting.
I’m so sorry about Dolly, Anna. I’ve unfortunately been there with two of my own dogs and it’s just really hard. There’s really nothing anyone can say to make it better, but I hope the time you two have together is the best ❤️ She knows how much she’s loved.
Anticipatory grief is a wild wild ride... I’m so sorry to hear this news about Dolly. Sending you so much strength to make it through this journey.💕